Saturday, August 27, 2011

Another baby step

So this week I started my new job- and I LOVE LOVE LOVE it. I think I have found my career "home." I know it is awfully soon to say that, but it is just a great fit for me. So, I am pleased as can be.

I am also pleased that I am now insured (though I haven't picked my plan yet). I called my bariatric surgeon's office. They asked me if I had lost all the weight I needed to (get down to 292) and I told a lie- said no, I was at 300. Last weigh-in I was around 305. So I'm not there yet. But I don't have a chance to go get weighed in for a bit anyway. So I am going to plug away. Anyhow, they told me to come in, get weighed, and then they would consult with the surgeon about moving forward. All you out there seem to get lap-band fairly quickly. They really make you work for it here.

Here is in the Northeast- which means hurricane Irene is on her way... We haven't gotten prepared for that other than food shopping. So we will do that first thing in the morning. All will be well I am sure.

The insurance- it makes me nervous. Of course as soon as I got access to benefit information online I searched for weight loss and surgery coverage. It said it covers gastric bypass, intestinal something else, and something else. But lap-band wasn't mentioned in any way that I have ever heard it referred to before. So I am going to have to get the details. I will be so bummed if it is not covered and will have to figure out a plan B. I have no idea what that would be. Maybe get health insurance under my husband's plan? I don't know. Blech.

Overall, life is good. Oh, and I got an IUD put in this week. For some weird reason that was really emotional for me. Perhaps because I was on my period (which is when they put it in YUCK!) but at least I won't have to remember to take birth control. Fun stuff :)

Thursday, August 18, 2011

This past week has been challenging because it is daycare vacation and I've got the kids 24/7. And I have to keep them quiet because Pops (what we call my husband/their father quite a bit, but Daddy works as well) is sleeping as he is now working the night shift.

I volunteered all day yesterday putting on a conference. It went really well but I did not realize how much time I was going to be "on." Not only on in front of everyone presenting, but the whole day my mind was "on." I had to get up at 6, take care of the babe (poor thing is still suffering from an ear infection and was up 2 times that night - and William woke up once cuz he very unusually peed his underwear in the bathroom so I was up 3 times the night before, having gone to bed at 11:30), get dressed up, get coffee going and breakfast, etc., then a friend of mine came to carpool at 7:00, and then two friends of mine came to watch the kids all day at 7:15. We left then and the day never stopped! I went to bed at 9 last night.

In terms of eating, I did okay. I had a greek yogurt for breakfast (the spell check wants me to capitalize greek, lol), stayed away from the continental breakfast of carbohydrates, a rollup sandwich of turkey, cheese, lettuce and roasted peppers, had veggies, 3 crackers, and 4 small pieces of cheese. Then had whole wheat pasta and turkey meatballs with tomato sauce for supper. And a jello sugar free mouse for desert. So it could have been worse. I also munched on some croutons (bad!) while making dinner. We also had bread with supper and I very much enjoyed that. Now with the level of sleep I got the night before, the stress of the day, being with people every moment of the day-- I call this a victory. I didn't count the calories (I went to bed early) but I may throw them in the counter later. I weighted myself and was up .6. After 2 not-spectacular days of eating. I am really really trying. So I feel like the .6 is not the end of the world.

Today has been okay as well. Much more relaxed. More yogurt for breakfast and then a wrap for lunch. I made a big salad to go with it, but found I wasn't hungry for the whole thing so I'll save that for my dinner with some chicken on top. I ate a fiber one bar instead.

Right now the baby is still sleeping, my older kiddo is up from his nap, and I'm thinking about going and getting them haircuts. Perhaps tonight we'll take the boys to the beach?

I'm starting to get really excited about work on Monday!

Monday, August 15, 2011

What I'm looking forward to

Today I was thinking about some of the things I am looking forward to once again. See, I did lose 90 lbs once before. It was great. Boy, don't I wish I had kept it off! Anyway, I'm looking forward to a lot of things.

  • Not worrying about weight capacities in kayaks, chairs, roller-coasters
  • Wearing shoes that don't make my feet look fat
  • Being able to shop in regular stores
  • Not having eczema any more
  • Not being tired all the time
  • Not having my feet hurt so quickly
  • Getting rid of back fat!!
In other news, I am down to 306. 11 lbs to go and then I am qualified for surgery! :)  It feels so strange to be excited by that number, but I am. At least it is going the right direction! Can you believe that AFTER I had my youngest I gained 20 lbs? Awesome-meeeeee.

I am still eating fairly low calorie. This is not easy with my kids being on daycare vacation. And this weekend was not stellar. But still, things are going okay.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Tracking away.......

So I am tracking away on my food intake. Calorie by calorie, grams of fat and protein everywhere... and hoping that it all makes a difference.
I know not to eat too little food so that my body goes into starvation mode. I've been averaging around 1500-1600 calories a day (remember, I am pre-band). I'm trying to get my weight down low enough so I don't have to spend much time with the bitch nutritionist. I've been dieting for a decade... there is little that she is going to tell me (her perfect skinny no-band self) that I haven't read, heard, learned, or done. She really had quite an attitude with me, essentially telling me I should have gastric bypass instead. That's for your opinion- now shut up! So I am hoping to get to the weight required (295) before my next appointment (which I have not set up yet- I get insurance a week from tomorrow).
It is amazing how much salt effects my weight. I had two salty foods one day and the next day the scale registered 2 lbs higher. Yikes. But I had done okay eating so it shouldn't have been 2 fat lbs. Whatever.. fluctuation is normal, right?
My husband starts his night job tonight. And the kids have daycare vacation all week. I've got a ton to get done before a conference on Wednesday (like, put together power point and prep for a presentation in front of 100 people) but I am not sure when I am going to do this. Perhaps during their nap tomorrow. I still have to go grocery shopping so we have some food to eat, too. I feel like all we did was run run run this weekend and no time for real rest. I am in need of it, especially since this week will have few breaks!
Off to dreamland :)

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Down :)

So I weighed myself this morning and I was down 2.8 lbs. Now, I realize that this is not all real weight loss, but it makes me feel good about the work that I have done the past two days. I know that sounds so silly, but it has been challenging. I love food... and I eat when I am stressed out. And I have a lot of stuff going on right now. Such as:
  • My Great-Aunt passed away this past weekend. She was almost 90. My Gram passed away almost 2 years ago and now there is only one sister left of the 5 siblings. Its sad to watch an era slowly pass away. And seeing Margaret only a week before... very sad. We knew she would go soon but I was hoping to see her one more time and get to spend some more time with her. In addition, she morphed to look a lot like my Gram in the past year, and that brings up a lot of sadness. 
  • I got a new job. It's going to be about an hour away from my home and that stresses me out. Leaving the field I work in stresses me out. I'm really really looking forward to it, but change can be hard. 
  • My husband is switching jobs to a night position. I do not love this for all the reasons you can imagine, especially having 2 young children at home. So I'm not looking forward to that. 
  • I've got a number of things going on right now - helping to facilitate a conference, preparing for a mentoring informational session, etc. Many irons in the fire, so to speak. 
  • I've got a HUGE to-do list of things to get done before I go back to work and lose all this "free" time. I have been working on it pretty hard-core but it is a substantial list. And the idea of not having this kind of time, and having 2 part-time jobs in addition to a full time job, two kids, a husband, and a home to take care of, is a little stressful. 
  • I know that it's "on" and I've got to lose some weight to get the surgery. This is my saving grace but is a stress-er, too.
 It is going to be a challenge to do this but I will get there. Right??? Right????

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Better living through better eating?

I am working on the 15 lbs I have to lose. Man, this is tough. I find myself thinking about food, oh, all the time. This is not normal for me. But I feel restricted by my diet so of course it is going to be this way at first. But I've got to get the 15 lbs off and so I am going to do what it takes. It is freaking tough, though.
So I am drinking protein shakes. Never done them before, so this is new. I am still getting used to it. I am having 2 per day. And I am tracking using So far, so good. Yesterday I ate 1655 calories with a lot of protein -- 125g. Perhaps I should do less on the protein? It didn't seem to make a difference one way or the other. I've tracked so far today and I'm doing well. So good stuff.
That's all... I just wanted to get it out there into the world that I'm starting to get on track. Here's hoping. I can't keep going up!!!

Sunday, August 7, 2011

A new job-- On to surgery!

I am so very pleased to write that I have a new job! I wasn't expecting to want to take the job, but when I think about all the good things that I will be doing, and then I look at the handsome salary, it is a no-brainer. And I get 4 weeks of vacation a year!!! I can't tell you how excited that makes me. My kids have 2 weeks of day-care vacation every year and so when you take those out of a three week a year job, it doesn't leave much time off at all- a couple of days around Christmas, maybe? A random Friday before a Monday holiday? So an extra week sounds fantabulous! In addition, Excellent! health insurance- and that means, on to band-land!
I am so happy about this. I start on the 22nd- so I hope to have surgery by the end of October, at the LATEST. Which means I have to get my buns in gear losing the 15 lbs required of me. Which sucks that I haven't done that yet. But I have really enjoyed the summer.
I am so hopeful, so excited, so >>>> ?? <<<< thrilled! to be taking this next step. I can't wait to have more energy.
The bad part of the job- it is about an hour away. The good part: it is something new, it pays really well with excellent benefits, and it is at a University. So... on to new and exciting things!