Monday, January 2, 2012

I'm going to get the hang of this band thing soon :)

What I mean by that is, I am going to slow down eating, chew chew chew, and avoid foods that aren't going to stick. This past week I've finally found myself getting stuck and it's probably happened 3-4 times. Hmm.... should I perhaps take notice and make some different choices? Ugh. It's so tough to be satisfied, though. I'm not eating huge amounts but I do love a good carb once in awhile. I'm not going to be fanatical about eating like a bird. I got a band for a reason-- to reduce volume, encourage positive food choices, etc... not to eliminate every bad food.

When I saw the nurse, who was kind of weird, for my fill, we went over my food. When we talked about coffee she asked me what I put in it. I told her fat free french vanilla creamer. She said to me "we will have to work on that." Oh really? I told her I didn't want to, that I believe in moderation and she insisted that if I get to a plateau, I will probably have to cut it out and that I could start now by using half milk and half creamer. I said "no.. that's not worth it to me." She again tried to tell me she was worried about these calories. Um... yeah, no. If I can't have 2 tablespoons of fat free creamer in my coffee..... just no. I mean, this is supposed to be liveable and not a deprivation diet. Another instance of someone at the bariatric center just not getting it. Maybe it's me, but I just don't think those 20-40 calories are going to be the make it or break it in my weight loss success. The band is a tool for me. If I don't lose 100 lbs in a year, so be it. I am going to live my life. I'm going to learn how to work the band, how to make changes that work for me and my goals. But I am not going to become some weirdo who can't have a cup of coffee or a cookie occasionally (she didn't ask me how holiday eating went, strangely enough. I've had way too many cookies in the past 5 weeks but she didn't ask, I didn't tell. I get that it isn't getting me to my goal faster that way, but I'm managing okay. I need time to figure this all out... and I had no restriction then, either!).

So the weight isn't magically melting off... shocker, I know. I really want to find a groove that works for me and stay in it. But I'm not there yet. I just haven't found it. But I'm starting to feel restriction (is it normal to take a couple of days??) and though I don't feel satisfied with 1 cup of food, I feel like that may happen after next fill. Still, my weight loss goal for January (fill is Feb 1st) is 10 lbs. I WILL do this. However, I did not weigh in today or yesterday, so I'll update on that later.

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